The Wages of Worry

Infinity Bites 6

“You’re still renting, at your age? With no savings? What went wrong? And how are you going to survive when you’re too old to work? And what about hospital bills? Well, you’re in Paris, so there are plenty of pretty bridges you can stake a claim and a cardboard box under…”

At the risk of sounding flippant, when someone seems to suggest I should be more “responsible” or need to “grow up a bit” or “get my act together”, I can’t help pointing out that whatever I’ve done or however I’ve acted up until now has… got me where I am today.

Happy?

And the Big Question is, therefore, how do I feel about that. Am I ok with “where I am today”, or am I racked with regrets and bitter, lip-gnawing remorse?

If it’s the latter, then maybe I should have, I don’t know… worried more? If, on the other hand, I feel fine, much to those nigglers’ and Beatle-haters’ chagrin, I guess I should carry on carrying on just as I am.

Which begs the question: Does worrying about things actually serve any purpose; does it help, or is it just a monumental waste of our precious present moments?

Should We Worry About Worriers?

At the risk of labouring the point, those people I talk to who seem to have spent a lot of time worrying in their lives, don’t appear to be particularly happy, even today. (Side question: so where did all that worrying actually get them.) Once a worrier, always a worrier…

On the contrary, those who haven’t spent an inordinate amount of time fretting and brow-furrowing don’t seem that stressed out now, either. In fact, they’re at ease with how things have turned out. As they were at most given moments in the past too.

Middle-Class Problems

I’m the first to acknowledge that many of the challenges I’ve faced in my life have been perfectly banal, privileged white middle-class ones. Common-or-garden addictions rubbing shoulders with shifting career conundrums; the usual boy-gets-girl, boy-loses-girl angst; in-fighting with the outlaws and the big existential Whys…

Still, I have, nevertheless, felt really bad in the past, on numerous occasions, but always managed to pull through. Creativity and a happy-go-lucky approach have helped.

Should I give that up and get all serious now than some seriously symbolic birthday has been reached and I’d better buckle down and get my ducks in a row, before, err… it’s too late?

And The Answer Is?

For me, in any case, spending my life worrying isn’t worth the stress! Whether we’re busy regretting the past, lamenting should’ves and could’ves, or in deep distress over something that might happen soon, if we’re not careful, and anyway there’s nothing we can do about it, and I really hope it doesn’t happen, but what if it does… we’re using up our limited present moments on it.

That doesn’t sound like a very good use of our time, does it? I’ve also noticed that as soon as you immerse yourself in some interesting or absorbing activity, all the worries tend to dissolve into the ether until we remember them and decide we should still be worrying about them.

Pick Your Bridge… Creatively!

I had this niggling thought, as I was writing this last section, that there was something else rather pressing I should be doing. Then I remembered it was just to start collecting sturdy boxes and scouting for suitable bridges with waterproof arches and not too much through traffic.

In the end, as the Stoics so cheerfully put it, if things get too bad, we can always kill ourselves. As I don’t appear to be there yet, I reckon I’ll just get on with enjoying myself right now, and see what happens next. And if you want to be in charge of doing all my worrying on my behalf, be my guest. I’ll keep a cardboard box warm for you!

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Sab has been exploring the creative human experience in Paris for over 25 years. He writes words, makes pictures and encourages connectedness every day. He thinks that being creative on a regular basis is a wonderful way to lead a worthwhile, enriching and generous life. He’d love to help you make the most of your infinite potential too, creatively and authentically…

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