Purpose & Meaning For Dummies

Infinity Bites 4

Yet another squidgy, squirmy feel-good article was wittering on about finding your true purpose in life, and making sure there is deep meaning driving everything you do, and I realised, or rather remembered, that I’d never quite understood what on earth the P&M words actually meant.

This bugged me, and for the first time ever I gave it a moment’s thought. I only needed half a second for some reason, before the simplicity and profundity of it struck me with such obviousness it sent me reeling.

Nothing Stuck!

I’ve probably heard similar explanations over and over, but none of them stuck. Now I have no doubt as to what all the fuss is about.

Maybe you have had similar mental wranglings over what your true life’s purpose could be, or how to inject this famous meaning into what you do. Well, at least I now have a simple definition to set out from, and here it is…

And The Answer Is…

Purpose is what you do and meaning is why you do it. What and why. And if that’s clear for you, you can relax, your brain-racking is done here, and you can get on with leading a fully… well, purposeful and meaningful life, and tell ’em Sab sent ya!

Flippancy aside – although I wasn’t joking above – let’s dig a little deeper.

Some people think we are “sent here” for a purpose, and that it’s “out there somewhere”. All we have to do is look hard enough, or be lucky enough, and we’ll stumble upon it; the sun will briskly brush the clouds away, the birds will spontaneously combust into song and our hard, lumpy beds will be smothered in fragrant roses (but watch out for the pricks…)!

Poppycock & Balderdash Inc.

I don’t believe that nonsense for a moment. I think any fanciful fairy tale based on puffed up self-importance and wishful thinking should be chased right back whence it came with dragons breathing fire up its butt to help it on its way.

What does seem like a pretty cool idea, though, is to adopt a purpose, which isn’t quite the same thing, but much more purposeful, far more satisfying, and a whole lot easier too.

How great it would be to feel we had found “a thing” – not some heaven-sent, pie-in-the-sky thing, no. I’m talking about loving doing something so much that you can quite happily imagine doing it for the rest of your time here. Wouldn’t that be cool? That would be your What.

My What? Oh, My What!

You may think you’ve already got a what, but hold on a sec. Are you sure? Just because you spend your days (or nights) doing some job, year after year, for example, doesn’t mean it’s what you would choose if you could choose anything at all. Does it?

In my experience, it can take many years, or decades, to first realise that you really should have a thing, second, to decide what that’s going to be, and third, actually start doing it for real. A long time, in other words, and for many it never happens.

Going Through Changes…

Some wonderful transformations occur once you have found something you absolutely love and would do even if you weren’t paid for it. In fact, it’s often what you do when you’re trying to avoid doing the other, much less fun thing, for money. Childhood hobbies and secret passions are among the usual suspects.

You go full steam ahead on enhancing your legendary model railway and start a blog to share your hints and tips, which becomes wildly popular.

You decide to write a book of gourmet recipes for diabetic foodies, and discover you are far from alone.

These are clues!

The changes include – but are not limited to, as they say – greater joy and satisfaction, effortless productivity and overflowing enthusiasm. Accompanied by a real sense of… purpose – you are at last doing something that feels just right.

Why On Earth..?

So much for finding something you love doing. If that’s going to truly satisfy you and give you the feeling that your life is actually useful in some way, you need to attach meaning to what you’re spending so much time on. That meaning generally has to extend way beyond little old you, if you don’t mind.

There comes a point in many folks’ lives when doing stuff just for us starts to ring a little hollow. This sensation comes with advancing years, when our focus seems to turn from getting as much as we can for ourselves, to giving as much as we can to others.

Churning Gears & Turning Years

Once our primordial sprog-popping functions have run their course and we’re overrun with offspring of all shapes and sizes, we look inward. We start asking those hazy old late-night existential questions. We wonder once again what it’s all about. Why we’re here. What’s going on.

We have this vague niggling thought that there might be Something A Bit Better To Do than what we’re doing right now, and that it might not just be about bumping up the bank account or catching the game or getting a few more beers in.

Sealing Our Fate

So we attach a Why to our What. A meaning to our purpose. A more global, philanthropic, for-other-people reason for doing our new-found passion-thing.

Your model railway obsession is shared by thousands of enthusiasts and a huge number of kids are also fascinated by trains. Classes and teachers love it when you display your lovingly detailed scaled locomotive reproductions on special school theme days, expounding the rich history of rail travel as a veritable expert!

Your delicious diabetic recipe book becomes a best seller and provides much needed comfort and support for fellow sufferers. Your innovative healthy concoctions are widely admired and featured in magazines and on television cooking shows nationwide.

And it feels great.

What Goes Around, Comes Around

Finding a purpose and meaning for our lives means that we know what we want to do and why we are doing it. Best of all, it’s not solely about us for once. Although, paradoxically, if we put all our surging energy into humankind-enriching endeavours, we might grow a far more powerful reputation than we ever would counting beans or pushing prams.

This final flip from navel-gazing to horizon-surveying, from taking to giving is no doubt built into our species with all the rest of our quirks and foibles, whether we’re aware of it or not. It’s just that the twisted society we’re wearily wedlocked to, for better or for worse, is trying to run far faster than it can walk, heaving on its own bootstraps and finally keeling over, red-faced from the effort.

From Embarrassed To Embraced

Feeling thoroughly embarrassed at our species is one tempting option these days, for sure. Thinking practically, opening our arms to those who need them, not judging but not approving unenlightened attitudes or behaviour either, might be the most useful course of action.

If we lead by example, whilst still having the occasional snigger at the morons out there – let’s not get too precious about it – we might yet have a stab at sanity in this seething cesspool we’re swimming in. Saving while frowning. The sun still rises, still beautiful, and so are we in our way. Terribly in our way.

GET COACHED BY SAB!

Sab has been exploring the creative human experience in Paris for over 25 years. He writes words, makes pictures and encourages connectedness every day. He thinks that being creative on a regular basis is a wonderful way to lead a worthwhile, enriching and generous life. He’d love to help you make the most of your infinite potential too, creatively and authentically…

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